Why Do I Care?

This past weekend I had a Pampered Chef Show.

I love having these kinds of things, but I hate inviting people.  It's not because I don't like having people come over to my house, it's because well...I don't want people to get an invitation and then feel the need to make something up so they can't come.

This is what I have a tendency to do. 

Okay I never do that.  I will go to the party out of guilt.  And I will spend money that we don't have.

I don't ever want to make people feel like I do over a Pampered Chef Show.

I don't know that I have ever not gone to a home party show that I have been invited to.  I have definitely NEVER gone and not bought something.

So I think it is better to not invite people so they don't have the uncomfortable position (that's how I feel) of saying no.

Then the vicious cycle begins.

I posted a Status Update on my Facebook saying thanks to my sister for coming and doing a show for me and I get comments from people like "I wasn't invited" and I'm sure these friends are not commenting to make me feel bad, but it makes me feel horrible - like the worst friend ever.

I would never post a comment like that.  I am afraid that everyone reads in to stuff like I do. 

The fact of the matter is, probably NO ONE reads in to stuff like I do.

I will throw around every possible scenario in my head of how someone could take how I comment on their Facebook Status.

Which is why I don't comment a lot.  I usually just "Like" statuses.

I don't want someone to be mad at me over a Status Update or comment.

Let me just clarify.  I am not mad at anyone.  I feel like people get mad at me.I deleted the post because I don't want any more comments that I can read WAY TOO MUCH in to and then feel bad about for days.

Part of my brain says "If you would have invited them, you could have had a show over $400 and then you could have gotten another $20 in credit AND another half price item.  Way to go."

Another part tries to justify not inviting them.  "Where would you have put another 10 people?  Your house it not big enough for that!".

So back to the title.  Why DO I care?  The little voices in my head are out of control some times.